Monday, December 28, 2009


By the lack of new posts it seems as if have been avoiding this blog. I almost have, because it would mean having to look at the date of my last post. A new post was always being conceptualized and then postponed. Not being one to feel guilty, I would rather look the other way and focus on the realities that are more rewarding in the short term. And so, I've been gaming in my spare hours. Like a rat in a Skinner box, I've pressed buttons in arcane sequences to get my sweet reward. And these lasts few months I've been a glutton. The need for relaxation has been in direct relation to the amount of work I've been doing. Where one would grow, so would the other. In short, it's been a very productive period. Both in the professional world as in the Skinner box. To the outside world it seems as if all I do is press buttons, wearing out keyboards, mice and Wacom pens. The same world that sees me effortlessly produce artwork and get satisfaction out of pressing buttons in order to make a game play itself, is starting to think that it actually takes no effort at all.
On both accounts, it is wrong.
My tasks are Crucial as to deserve capitalization and the games I play are as brilliant as any great Belgian novel. Or so I keep telling myself. In the eyes of some one in the know, I must seem like an intellectual of the modern age. Yet to some one in the real world, it must seem like a lazy office jockey who earns a living by letting the computer do all the hard work for him and is addicted to pressing buttons at night. I must have been the nightmare of the previous age. An overqualified hippy with nonsensical morals based on a fantasy world of dreams and drugs. Someone who doesn't know how to take life serious and doesn't know what it is to do actual work. My parents used to threaten me with this actual work by saying: "If you don't do good at school, you'll spend the rest of your life carrying a lunchbox to a factory".

And so, after completing not one but two higher diplomas, one of which is on par with a university degree, I got a creative job that pays reasonably well. However, irony has it that now my parents wag their finger at me for not knowing what actual work is, and that I should probably do more of it, instead of letting the computer work late and playing those silly little games on it when it's done. So on to my blog where I talk about games and only hint at the work I pretend to do!
The next part is about a few games I played, and it's there because I told the blog posting algorithm to mention the names I input before leaning back and sipping my tea. I also mentioned it to write in a manner to attract lustful females and to garner world fame. I'm not expecting it to be flawless, two out of three objectives met is still an acceptable result.

I've played and enjoyed Need For Speed: Shift. The demo convinced me of its quality, and I bought it shortly after. I've always appreciated racing games. Mostly for their obsessive compulsion gameplay of driving a car efficiently. My last serious racing effort was Xpand Rally some years ago and more recently Mario Kart Wii, so I'm hardly an authority on the subject. NFSS has a sense of speed of a roller-coaster, and that's what makes it rather special. Racing a car on one of its tracks feels like controlling a rocket powered skateboard on the downwards slope of an active vulcano. The game has a leg up on other racing games in its style and it's truly phenomenal cockpit view. I've also been known to call it "Top Gear: the game". There isn't much to talk about with this game - there's no higher understanding of life because of it. On my parents scale of approval it would propably score to be "very silly indeed". What they don't know is that I'm using these racing games as a simulator in order to easily acquire a real driver's license. This is, of course, using my parent's mindset that, if games like call of duty are ruthless murder training devices, racing games must be ideal in order to be a driver.

To make matters even worse, I've been dabbling in satanism and demonology! It's no wonder that my feeble Atheist mind would one day succumb to the seduction of the beast itself. Because what could be worse then playing Dungeons and Dragons? Why a computer game that is the tier3 evolution of D&D! And why is this evil ruleset so evil? Because it's a ruleset that's been streamlined in such a way that the computer does all the calculating! Truly this is a magnitude of wickedness not seen in any game all year! (HINT)
Because of it's inherent didactic nature the game teaches among other things: magic, lesbianism, homosexualism, alcoholism, unholy and generally shady dealing, pick-pocketing, cursing, cursing, smuggling, drug trafficking, genocide and worst of all, blasphemy. The name of this unthinkable yet unbelievably seductive abomination is Dragon Age:Origins. On the caring parent's scale this game has fallen of the "silly" and into the "dead serious". It'd probably only be remedied, and I saved, by sacrificing one's eldest son, namely: me.
Or perhaps it's only a phase.
Either way. The game has left me a powerless thrall unable to appreciate any other game.

Self-prescribed medication has been ordered in the form of Modern Warfare 2: murder simulator and Torchlight:Even more devils and demons.

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